Here we are. A few days before the big race. The one that changed my life’s routine for the last 9 months. The one I started this blog for. The North Downs Way 50. Soon I will know if I have what it takes to run an ultramarathon. I will find out if I trained enough to run 50 miles. I though about this blog posts for months and now I am not sure what I should write.
It has definitely been an amazing journey. Last year I was racing a half marathon a month. A couple of races were a bit longer, 16 miles, but not much more. Then I decided to try something new. To test myself and I became addicted to the whole ultra and trails running idea. I went from running less than 40k a week to running 120k.
I did it scientifically. I read books. I listened to old and new friends who knew better. I think I did well. I never got seriously injured. I almost improved my diet too. I definitely feel stronger. I feel ready, physically at least. Is my head ready? I will find out Saturday.
Since last summer I have been running 6 times a week all of the weeks except a couple, either because I was not home or I was not well, but I did stick to my training plans virtually all the time. I am proud of the effort I put in.
But this journey did not just start last summer. I think this is the culmination of a longer journey. I have started running roughly seven years ago, when my dad passed away. The idea was to try and do something to keep my head from thinking too much. I needed something to fight that horrible time. It did not work. Running gives you too much time to think. You spend too much time alone and you cannot run away from such a loss. Even seven years later the pain is still there, with the same strength.
What did change was the fact that I realised running was fun. After the first weeks where I could not run more than 2k I started improving and a new world opened up and I got addicted.
I think I needed it. You can have a fantastic family (like I do), a career you are happy with (like I do most of the time :)), but you need an addiction in your life. You need something that is all yours. Something that keeps your mind busy when you need it busy. You need a passion and I believe passions should be almost unhealthy, otherwise they are not a passion.
When I was young I had two passions. Video games and skateboarding. Video games are so important in my life that I made a career out of them so that’s a passion I feed daily. Skateboarding was all my life for ten years. Everything else was less important (as my school results can attest). I was skating every day. I was good at it. I had people giving me free stuff. I won some contests (small ones) and could not think of anything else. I was not the only one. All my friends had burning passions. Some were skating like crazy like me. Some were into music and we knew all the most obscure bands, we played rough music, we went to gigs. I learnt from my friends that passions are worth feeding. All my friends are still crazy about something. Someone runs more than me, others snowboard like pros, others were into art and keep on creating. I don’t know if I was lucky or what, but my friends and my family always made it possible to do things 101%.
I always wanted adventures and I think that, slowly, running has become my way to go for adventures, even short ones in the park behind my house. It slowly became my passion and something I wanted to do with 101% effort. That’s why I think it is not surprising that I finally got to the point of preparing for an ultra. I always knew one day I wanted to jump from half to full marathon. I did that in 4 months and now it is time to go for an ultra. A bit quick maybe, but passions make us crazy.
Whatever the result of the race on Saturday I will be happy. I had the chance to make new friends. I broke my records. I made myself more disciplined. I feel better as a person as a whole. Some people might think I am silly and that there are more important things in life. Yes there are, a lot of them actually, but running is not making me lose sight of what’s important. On the contrary it gives clarity and purpose.
I’d like to thank all the people that supported me in this journey. All the people that gave me hints and all the people that have asked me questions. I hope my daughters will not think that they have a crazy dad, but will hopefully see that cultivating a passion is good. That doing things 101% is how things should be done. And you do not need to win to be happy. You do not need to run a marathon sub 2:30 to be a runner. You can be happy for your career even if you are not a CEO. What counts at the end of the day is that you have put in your effort and a bit more, if you do that something good will come.
Ok maybe I am over-thinking this. This post might be too much. It is just a run after all, but for me it’s been a long journey and it is just the beginning!
This week I have been mostly resting with only 2 short runs, so no usual post this time. The next post will be my race report. If you want to follow it in real time you can check out this page on Saturday.
I hope I have not bored you too much. See you out there, giving your 101%.